I met a Girl...

So hi guys!

This is going to be real time. No story today.

Actually, not much of a post today at all.

Just me bragging. Is that okay?

I met a girl.

Yes. Yes, I did.

She is funny, intelligent, gorgeous, kind, an amazing kisser.

And, best part, she likes me!

Ahhh. I am on cloud nine right now.

See, I like to take things slowly. Most girls tend to be the total opposite of that. But not this girl. She is so on board with my uber corny, oh so cheesy, let's go slow and be chivalrous self. Ah! I adore her.

Okay, I shall stop bragging now. Good God, she is just so damn beautiful.

Soon I shall put up another post. I will be back to my normal self. But right now, I just cannot seem to think straight ladies (ha, haven't thought straight since age 13 but whatever man).

Bye!
-ThatOneGayGirl

That One Friday Night

We need to take a moment to explain how I operate. It will help with explaining both all my relationships with women in the past...and it will help to explain why this last Friday night was unbelievably out of character for me.

Ok, here we go.

How I operate: I am a terrible flirt. Meaning that I basically throw caution to the wind and flirt with every girl who crosses my path. I even flirt with boys if the mood strikes. But the thing is, I don't intentionally flirt with these girls. It just happens. Like, when I start talking to girls I just remember little details or pick up on quirks and it comes off to those girls as hardcore flirting. When I actually flirt with a girl intentionally though, then it is amazingly obvious.

Anyway, after that flirting stage, I am super old-school. The type who takes a girl out on a date, brings her flowers, opens doors, etc. And I do the whole first kiss after the first date thing and then make sure that I call the next day so she doesn't freak out.

Well, none of that happened Friday night.

I went out. With friends. Gay club here we come!

While there I met this girl. She was really cute. I tried to talk to her and failed repeatedly. She was tall, femme, smooth dancer, and kept giving me looks like she was interested. And yet, I couldn't seem to make effective contact with her. All the while, without my knowledge, another girl was watching what I can only imagine was a semi-hilarious scene unfold. So the other girl came over to me and initiated a conversation. She wasn't as attractive as the tall girl that I was failing so miserably with but hey, beggars can't be choosers.

So I began to dance with this girl. I learned that she is European, recently graduated from college with a degree in music, speaks like four languages, and had some killer moves. Next thing I know she was kissing me. And the next thing I realize it is almost 2 hours later and half of our dancing party has left and some of the gay boys are gawking at us. What in the world was I doing?!?

This was not me. And yet, her lips felt amazing, so I said "screw it," and kept going.

I shouldn't have said screw it. The next morning I wake up with a swollen and slightly bruised lower lip. I had work in the next hour and placing an ice cube on my lip was not cutting it. I had to speak to customers all day and my lip was more than a little obvious.

Basically, I think I learned my lesson. No matter how hot that girl on the dance floor is, if you're a girl who takes things slow, just stick to your methods. Otherwise, you may wind up with funny looks at work the next day.

-ThatOneGayGirl

And the Wedding Bells Toll

Hey y'all! Lezzies, let's talk marriage.

Uhm, hello? How cute is this? Too cute.

Gosh, I barely make it through five posts before I spring marriage on y'all. What can I say? I live by the time of lesbians. In case you don't understand what lesbian time actually is, I have created a little chart for you to reference as you read along... and as you go along in your lesbian dating life. If you DO know what lesbian time is, then Congrats!!! You have probably experienced something along the timeline below! Yay! Applause for you!

First date = First Kiss

Second date= Moving in (U-Haul)

Third date = Talking marriage, babies, etc

Fourth date = Arguing

Fifth date = Overcoming Arguing Stage or Moving Out

Sixth date (if Fifth date ended with Moving Out) = Promising to stay Friends

because what lesbian exes aren’t still friends?

Ok, now that we have covered that, let's get on to this marriage talk. Now, I did not run off and get married recently. Shoot, I'm barely holding down my semi sorta kinda relationship that I have going on right now. BUT, the majority of my friends are off dancing in a field of flowers full of hopes and dreams and images of white dresses, stunning tuxes, and large wedding venues. Even better, my mother just recently said, "I Do," to her long time boyfriend!

Guys, I feel so left out. To make matters worse (or better depending on how you view things), my new "step-dad" has two moms. Yeah. So what did I have to listen to the entire wedding week? I had to listen to my new lesbian grandmas tell me how great it is that there are now more states that allow us gays to get married! I had to listen to how I was obviously behind the ball by not already being engaged!

Granted, all the talk really made me smile. Look how far we have come! There ARE more states that we can now dedicate our lives to each other till death do us part just like all the heteros in the world! GO US!!!

Still, I'm basically single. Hanging out with so many oh not so single friends. What's a girl to do?]

-ThatOneGayGirl

PS-My mother's dress was absolutely stunning. And my grandmas said that I need to make my wardrobe even more gay (if humanly possible). Top it all off, my grandmas want me to venture to Dinah Shore with them this coming year. How would that look? My twenty-something ass with two seventy year olds who can both out party me. Ha. Oh Joy.

For more cute lesbian wedding photos just because I am obsessed and picture my future wedding in my head all the time:



This show is such a guilty pleasure.

Did I over do it? Too many cute wedding photos? Awh, I'm sorry. I'd love to see more wedding photos though! If you have any to share, please do!!!